I used to work as a disability carer
because for a while there I was all heart and no education. I enjoyed my time and met a lot of
inspiring people & a few annoying
ones. On the positive, I once
saw a lady with one arm and no legs pull herself out of bed, slide into a wheel
chair, roll into the kitchen and make herself toast with jam. My first thought
was ‘She’s doing her own condiments, I might be out of a job here.’ We’re
talking lids, knives, undoing that plastic bread clip. It was an impressive
display of chin work. My second
thought was, ‘Why isn’t this woman running the country? Clearly she’s a problem
solver.’ Initially it was a wise crack for my mind only, but now I’m certain it
will be asked en mass by those of us tired by the current heightened state of
affairs.
We seem intent on getting tall able-bodied
men to lead us, somehow believing height equals intelligence and strength. Every
time it’s a tall guy sprouting the same rubbish. He gets ousted and we get
another tall guy. I’m six foot three and I’m telling you, it’s bullshit, we’re
morons. I’m basing that on no scientific evidence. Why? I’m a tall moron and
that’s what we do. But as a tall man I will suggest that we put our prejudices
aside and start allowing space for the more oddly shaped movers and shakers of
the world, because they’d make fine leaders.
First up, Minister for Communication:
Someone with a heavy dose of cerebral palsy. I’ve met several folks with this
condition and they’ve all been as smart as a whip. Talking to them is a pleasure
as when you finally understand what they’re saying you realise it’s never
rubbish. Every word counts. And wouldn’t we love to see journalists (I use that
word like they still exist) have to pause and listen before realising they’re
being told to bugger off.
I’d like to see a legless man run finances. When your economy
has no legs who better to run it? Actually anyone who can survive and prosper
on a disability pension would be more than qualified for the position.
Minister for Policing: Someone with just
enough autism to get the job done. I once had to help out a young man who was
on the spectrum and wheel chair bound. Nothing got past this guy. You don’t
know guilt until someone wheels up to you and says, ‘Adam, I know you steal
biscuits.’ How did he know? The pantry door was shut! There was no noisy
wrapping. I chewed with my mouth closed & covered it with a scarf. I was muffled! ‘I’m not angry I’m just
really disappointed.’ As he wheeled himself out of the kitchen with his head
shaking from side to side, I genuinely wanted to call my mum. There’d be no
sweeping corruption under the carpet with this guy in your cabinet.
I’d like to see the Minister for Defence be
someone who has stepped on a landmine and survived. Our troops might not be
sent to troubled zones if the person doing the sending is at least experiencing
phantom pain.
The big job: I’d like to see a party leader
who appreciates freedom, demonstrates compassion, someone who knows how to overcome
adversity, a person who takes what they’re given and makes the most of it. Now
I’m sure many people qualify for this position but I want the person most
qualified and even a moron knows, they are probably not tall.
How did he know???
ReplyDeleteHe just did. I've noticed that people who are physically restricted have great sense of what is theirs and where it is positioned. I once shifted a guy's DVD an inch and he could tell. He knew where everything was in his room.
ReplyDelete